The 18th Anniversary Show (Sep '23).

Originally posted by Sully.






“Ten spears go to battle," he whispered, "and nine shatter. Did the war forge the one that remained? No, Amaran. All the war did was identify the spear that would not break.”

Originally posted by rawr.

Promo reviews.

Originally posted by Rosie.

I'll start with some promo reviews/reactions. I think I'll go for a few newer peeps, then after I'll go with a few which stood out for me. I won't do the main event, but I'll at least state I read all of the promos (apart from Gip's which was DM'ed due to him being lost in London) and that I genuinely like all of them.

Madison Gray: @vinegar

While you still have room to grow, I'm starting to see you get some actual flow in your writing and you're starting to flesh out Madison a bit more. Explaining her time away a bit, Sydney as a side character can lead to potentially great directions with growth. The end also establishes her as a babyface. "Fight for the fans" etc. The dialogue also is starting to improve. I think your first promo I wasn't 100% sure what to make of Madison with her saying something like "This is a shoot!" in her first promo. Then the cheeky growl at the end, sort of shows some playfulness which I like. I think something which took me back slightly is the format shift from

Name
Speech

To

Name: speech

I think both are fine and some promos you may format it slightly differently depending on what is required. Example, my singles promo, for having more characters I did the name: "speech" thing and in my trios promo, with it being smaller, I didn't need to. But I think for a promo to have it consistent throughout the promo is a good thing, but that is a nitpick/pet peeve. I think the rest will likely come as you write more with her, get more comfortable in a flow with her, and then learn to expand your ideas. So improvement is noted already.

Blake Taylor: @thedevilhimself

I think some of the trash talk in this promo was nice. I definitely get that Blake has a chip on his shoulder and a bit of a mean-streak, a sense that "I did all this in my sports beforehand, so this is nothing." Like a dismissive attitude to wrestling how "I don't need to change anything up. This is nothing compared to what I did before." We also do get a hint into his life before MMA and wrestling, Him acting extravagant, craving money and such because he didn't have it as a kid, and, once again, that chip on his shoulder "I earned this."

But where to improve. First I do think grammar needs to be touched up. Some lines like "I got woman to do" does take me out of it a touch. One woman? What's her name? Or do you mean "women" as in he's a guy who's a macho guy who loves to get with his freaks like Scott Steiner. We all aren't linguistic scholars but going through a spell check and touching these things up, maybe reading it out loud as you're writing to make sure it sounds right is a good start.

Second, I do think the setting is rather basic. In some ways I do think it works a bit for him being this multi-sport athlete to have a press-conference, answer some questions, but that usually doesn't score well on its own unless you have other things with it to make it pop. I'm not saying you need some dramatic multi-scene set-piece with magic and wizards and dragons, but some expansion helps. Even some more gritty reality based promos can do well. I think a couple strong examples I can point to are from Back in Business. The two main events had some promos which had some sense of grounded-ness. Krash created an amazing story of Krash being weak physically, us learning through his actions/reactions and scene how he is mentally. Jeremy Best had some flashbacks and some dreams to incorporate his relationship with his idol, Krash, but the end was this eulogy which was really powerful which tied everything together and in the end, both were promo of the year contenders.

Then another good promo even if it is in a loss was Cyrus Truth's promo for the main event. He sort of stripped it back and focused on a strong monologue with a great flow, emotion, and powerful message, throwing in some imagery to add to his points. Even something a bit less intimidating of an example from him but still really solid was his promo this show where him and Konchu were walking through a graveyard, looking at tag teams of past and present, wondering what their goal was for the future as a tag team now.

I do think the basic idea of the character, this guy walking into wrestling from MMA, cocky, thinks he's above it all is a good base for a character and you're likely coming off with rust, but I hope some of this maybe gives you ideas to build on. As you get involved in matches, segments, etc, you maybe can use those results and events to tell a story with him.

Jack the Clipper: aon

I don't think I need to do some grand feedback for you since you've been through all of this. But I'll say, this exceeded my expectations a bit as I expected just "Let's be silly with an evil barber" and was expecting Issac Yankam. The promo starting with him stating his name and his story, gives a good insight into his backstory. Then his rant was almost psychotic, controlled, and in some ways chilling. Then the repetition of "Wrong place, wrong time" sort of to hammer home a message. Nothing personal, just... wrong place... wrong time.

I'd do more, but my brother's cat is meowing and bitching and I can't let him out because, you know, my brother keeps two cats who need to be kept separate to prevent Ultimate Fighting Cats from breaking out. So after.

*

Here's my follow up which I call "People who had promos which made me either lose it in madness or wow'ed me away" *Ignoring opponents.

tommy Bedlam

First of all, when I read the title I was like "Dear God, is this a Batman parody?" And low and behold it was. As soon as I read that BatTom replaced the batmobile with a BatTruck, I instantly lost it. This is something a bit out of your typical wheel house, but one which just worked and the casting choice of XYZ as the Riddler was a great choice. Very good when it came to small witty dialogue as well with Tommy trying to solve each riddle, it reminded me why, of all of the Superheroes of DC, Batman is probably my favourite. Regardless what happens with your match result, you came out swinging. with the Bat-Bat (A baseball bat with a bat logo on it).

@cyrus Truth

I acknowledged this a bit when giving an example of how to keep a hint grounded but still try to do some things creatively with setting and imagery, but I definitely enjoyed this. The graveyard setting is far from the most "unique" setting in e-fed or wrestling history, but its use here was clever, this new tag team walking through the graves of past and current tag teams who failed, along the path they are walking together now. It's a shame Grim was unable to promo against you since he was on a roll and it would have been a fun match in terms of comparing this to what he would do, but back to back tag title losses, a rough week of some beloved icons in wrestling passing, among whatever personal stuff going (and AMA too actually posting a show and having promos) it is understandable that he may not be feeling up to writing a promo of his normal quality.

𝓢𝓪𝓷𝓽𝓪 𝓢𝓾𝓵𝓵𝔂

Creative idea with channel surfing, I nearly pissed myself laughing at the Gordan Ramsey insults. This genuinely stood out to me a lot with the concept and subject matter. Each section in your way was putting your case for the TV title. Then the ending with her returning to early Fallout, great for character development. I do think, individually, some of the individual channels could have been full fledged promos so you might have lost a proverbial "bullet" or two there, but otherwise this may put you as the favourite for the TV title.

Those are four I have something off the top of my head for. Some I think I can say more about with a second reading.

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Originally posted by Sully.

Alyster Black:

The Seven Deadly Sins theme is a favorite of mine. That was the backdrop of my promo that got me into my first World Title match, so it's a good choice here to win you the world title. I did similar where I assigned every sin to a different opponent. The difference was I think Sully ended up being all the sins in the end, where as Alyster took up Greed (I think I assigned greed to Cyrus Truth). So I like the take of Alyster basically saying, yeah I'm greedy and I want it all and I don't care. Some parts of this seemed to go too quick and felt rushed, but overall I think the Krash dialog parts are the real meat of this promo. Krash calling Alyster out for not saving him hit hard. I don't know if there's a deeper character dynamic that's more layered than Krash/Alyster Black. It definitely is carrying this promo.

*

Jack The Clipper: Love it. This was a big Chris Kennedy type monologue where Jack did a pretty good job shooting on his opponents. I think once we get to the meat where Jack starts going in on Madison and Blake, you can feel the hairs on the back of your neck stand up. "Madison Grey, Blake Taylor. You were involved in a game of Russian Roulette that you didn't even know about, and you lost. Your life was put on the line, and now you both get tossed into the pit with the lion that's gonna rip you apart. You're gonna be lucky to just survive the pain I'm bringing your way because you need to understand, when you walk down that ramp come show time…. You're not walking into a ring where you've been honing your craft for the last year. Instead? You're walking into my house. My moment. That I've been working years to get to..and you think in one night either of you can take this moment from me? See ya gotta understand, both of ya think you're ya going be in for a fight, but you're not stepping into the ring; at the anniversary show, that ring is gonna turn into a place like this" - Ohh chills. Literal chills. The part where you absolutely tear apart Blake Taylor, the MMA, and Joe Rogan had me rolling too. Those were all good parts. The problem is though, monologue promos like this just don't work as well in today's FWA. It's all dialog, and I think this is where debuting as a new charcter for both you and Blake put you guys at a disadvantage here...because it's so hard to display character development in an opening promo. I think a vignette promo like this works for an episode of Meltdown or Fallout, but when fighting in a number one contenders match it's really hard to come in and write a winning promo out of the gate for a brand new character.

I'm also going to say, and you're not going to like this and maybe it's a hot take, but there's a recurring theme with AON characters. And it's that they don't live past their gimmicks. Gimmicks only go so long, eventually like snake skin you have to shead it and evolve. But I think with Yuna, or Jack The Clipper, or Lilith, or whoever...eventually the gimmick runs itself out, and that's what I fear for Jack. The evil barber gimmick is great, but I think the biggest thing to work on is how do you evolve that. Of course I said the same exact think to Chris fucking Peacock when he debuted and here that motherfucking is still dancing around and carrying the world championship so what do I actually know?

Tommy Bedlam: Pinning XYZ as the Riddler is great. I think Superhero promos are always fun because they definitely paint this contorted point of view that you're the hero and the guy you're facing is the bad guy. Especially when in reality the lines are much more blurred. I do think the Batman/Riddler gimmick was sort of dropped halfway through and it seemed like Tommy was just Tommy. I wasn't really picturing him as Batman without because I feel like that imagery wasn't consistent, but I think you were going for like a Bruce Wayne/Tommy Bedlam sort of thing, as by Chapter 3 we do switch back over to more of a direct Batman look when the action gets going. The presentation was pretty solid with things like the ransom notes with the different background and font, along with the comic book-type action splats towards the end. I liked the ending well, and enjoyed the comedic jabs of Tommy throwing him of the roof, but he isn't dead. Nice little parody of comic book logic. But the ending in that, even after Tommy takes care of XYZ there's still going to be threats coming after his title, it's a nice staple that sort of outlines the theme of this promo pretty nicely. Not that Tommy is Batman and XYZ is The Ridder, but that Tommy sees himself as this Superhero defending this city/title, and there's always going to be threats.

Jackson Fenix: Just going to start by saying I think this is one of your best promos of all the times. We've seen a few promos where the characters speak to a duplicate version of himself, but I enjoyed this "Bad Fenix" being more like...a personification of a bad self esteem, and not just like an evil devil on the shoulder. I also enjoyed the Snitsky reference. Jackson keep having to reassure himself and ignore those negative thoughts I think is a pretty solid introduction to the promo, one that should be looped back around. The middle part with Nate and Jackson is good and shows the history between these two friends, and also Nate sort of serves as a voice for the reader in observing that something is definitely wrong with Jackson. I like the transitions in the last part. With you not having the name but just the dialog and color you can as the reader know that the voice is just in his head at that point, but when he stands in front of him the format changes again with the name. I think when we talk presentation we think fancy colors and pictures but I also think things like that are part of presentation and have more thought behind it sometimes than just a cool gif. Overall this promo was a nice little feel good one, with Jackson battling his inner demons. It really gives major babyface vibes, The Disney Channel feel good stuff might be a little too on the nose at the end with Nate hugging him and closing it out, but overall this promo at the very least has gotten me on Team Jackson. I agree with SS that while some of the other promos in the roulette came off very listy, this promo does a good job of avoiding that and focusing on the whole.

Katsu: I think a prison promo is a pretty solid choice given the setting of Katsu's match, and I think using setting to symbolize your match setting isn't something we see enough...I mean I guess we don't get the opportunity as writers enough, but I'm glad you saw it and took it. Not sure how far that goes grading-wise, but personally I think it'd play a little bit into it for me. As far as presentation goes I think overall as far as formatting goes everything looks solid with the graphics, font, and colors. The only thing I don't like is the left alignment, maybe it's personal preference but I'm also big on centered alignment for the most part. Maybe if we're doing a flashback or I want to differentiate between scenes somehow I'd switch back and forth, but overall making everything left aligned feels off to me. Not a huge deal though, but just something I'm pointing out. The "opening credits" part of the promo I thought was creative and had solid imagery because as you read it you can sort of see it all playing out, especially if you play the song. I think each section is done pretty well, but it's clear Alyster Black and Chris Peacock took a bigger focus. I agree with SS that it gets a bit listy at parts, but I don't think it's a list promo. I've seen worse, I think if you did each section with a different opponent and then didn't loop the others back in here and there it'd be more of a list promo, and I think some characters like Jackson Fenix and Death Walker do get that treatment, but Alyster and Peacock definitely seem to have some recurring parts. I mean even Cole and Jackson keep coming back around to. Overall I think you used all your opponents as characters, and keep all of those characters overall recurring throughout as they try to work through this conflict.

I also disagree with SS in the fact that it really matters whether or not you perfectly captured the way that Chris Peacock talks or whatever, as I think this is intended to be a parody. If you were writing Chris Peacock as Chris Peacock, I'd be more concerned that you're using Chris Peacock w/o permission. I think using other characters, especially by direct name, is risky enough as it is, so you tread a thin line when it comes to writing dialog for them. I think it's safer to make it more of a parody than to try and imitate their mannerisms from head to toe.

I think my only gripe story-wise is Katsu comes in and has some major main character energy, which is probably the point, but I do think in reality she's with some very strong personalities, and I don't know if they'd have even let her have her big monologue moment at the end. But in a way I think that's sort of the message, that Katsu does see herself as big as they are. Again I'd also echo what I said earlier in that I think Alyster and Peacock sort of overshadow Cole, Jackson, and Death Walker in this story. Which is fine, I think you identified them as the two biggest threats, but it's a gamble if one of those three end up coming guns ablazing.

Overall I think this was a world title caliber promo, and did send the message that Katsu/you were trying to send which was that you're on that level.

Trixie Bordeaux: First of all from a presentation standpoint I like the way you portrayed this black and white setting. You'd think you could just do a white background black font style, but that wouldn't give me that vibe. The backgrounds, fonts, and blends you use really give off right away that this is an old timey black and white sort of deal. Your world-building of Fantasyland is really well done and I enjoy the throwback to Matty Robinson that I feel like most newbies wouldn't know, so it's clear you paid attention in FWA history class. I enjoyed the reportrayal of Blair and Celestia's loss to DSI, and Trixie's point of view. I think it does a good job of showcasing Trixie's care for her friends, and building off a stable loss that I personally was probably just going to move on from instead of using it in a productive way like this. The final chapter I think is what brings it all together with the carnival. I think the portrayal of Chris Crowe again goes back to what I said in the Katsu review, in that you don't have to portray the character you're parodying accurately, because obviously it's an exaggerated parody. Although I think the parody is more clear here, so there's less confusion. Crowe comes off as Disney villain here, and I think from Trixie's POV that absolutely makes sense. Overall I think this does a good job of showcasing Trixie as being this person, while naive and silly...is someone who is brave and willing to stand up for her friends, and that's something that's sort of been slowly developing since Trixie met The Coven girls.

Blake Taylor: I think overall this is a better promo than most dudes come in and write as their first promo in the FWA. It can take a while to adjust. I'm also surprised that you were able to utilize some FWA reporter personalities. Shake Meltzer not as much because he's pretty well known, but I don't even remember where I had posts from Ty Johnson and Nuances of Wrestling on this site, so I sort of popped when you had him show up. I think a first promo, especially on a big show, is hard but overall you did a solid introduction to the character while also referencing your opponents and the match and I think that's about as much as I would ask for from a first-time promo. Eventually, though you're going to need to evolve your story, settings, and visuals in new ways. I suggest taking a gander through and reading some other promos this show to get a solid idea on what kind of heat your opponents are going to be throwing.

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Originally posted by SupineSnake.

Some quick rambling thoughts on the main event promos. Not proofing so this I imagine is a mess.

Think three of the promos here had prominent list components to them, but amongst these three this opponent-register element took up differing positions and proportions of the structure. The Chris Peacock promo probably made most significant use of this device, with going through each of the opponents in turn - albeit in a super creative way, with the champion visiting some of the past memorable locations we’ve seen him in (will speak more about this later) - taking up essentially the entirety of the promo. Think the structure you chose here definitely felt fragmented and episodic, only tied together by common themes and a vague narrative thread. Sort of felt a little like an anthology, which doesn’t have to be a bad thing. I guess a promo like this will struggle to escape inconsistency in terms of quality and quantity in the sections, especially considering the circumstances of its writing, although it is true that the heights here are amongst some of your best stuff. Particularly enjoyed the closing sections, which - although brief - were ominous and brooding and almost Cyrus-esque in their construction.

The Katsu promo also felt like it relied on this list dynamic to a certain extent, with the first maybe three-quarters of the promo a series of conversation between Katsu and stand-ins for her forthcoming opponents. Again, I think there’s inconsistencies in quality between these conversations, especially in terms of the believability of your characterisations of the other contenders. I think you had more success, for instance, with Fenix, the Dark Guardian, and (maybe to a lesser extent) Cole than you did with the FTN boys. With that said, although I thought the Peacock dialogue read as unnatural for that character I did think the points you were making with that section were good and probably made up for it. Like in the Peacock promo, the listing structure of the promo does in some ways remove some of the dramatic potential from the story, in that we are sort of locked into a structure. After reading two conversations between Katsu and her fellow inmates, or two visits by Peacock to alternate realities, I know how the rest of the promo is going to look and what to expect from much of the rest of it. There’s merit in each section individually, though, and I thought the best section of the promo came at the end of it, where you subverted my expectation of seeing the fight with a lengthy dialogue involving all of the introduced inmates, which was probably the most interesting interlude in the roleplay for me.

Alyster had something of a list element in his promo, with the seven sins sections and the letters (or thoughts expressed maybe) to the six opponents (loved the Cole one particularly). I think this roleplay, out of the three I’ve spoken about so far did the most to escape the structural pitfalls of taking this approach by the threading of a more linear interlude of events that were separate to (almost superceding) the ‘list’. The seven sins sections were used more to break up the separate dialogues that Black engages in and to tie together some of the themes of the promo, whilst also providing opponent focus and fed-related character focus. There was a lot of that here, with character portrayal being typically strong. I enjoyed the focus on the relationship between Black and Krash and some of the other figures with more long-term attachments to Alyster. Highlighting Black’s newer relationship with Chris Peacock through dialogues with these more permanent fixtures in his life was interesting. I thought in many ways the central thrust of this promo was Black’s toxicity and his inability to sustain meaningful, healthy relationships, which was very pertinent considering the dynamic between him and Peacock going into the match.

Cole, Fenix, and Walker all escaped this list approach for the most part, and I think Reagan and Jackson in particular chose to focus on their own character development as opposed to opponent focus. This is a perfectly valid approach and one that many (myself included) have had success with in the past. The Fenix promo focused on the recent character progression we’ve seen from Fenix, with Jackson showing more sympathetic qualities in recent weeks in an arc that I’ve been really enjoying. Here we see him confronted, quite literally, by the past and a version of himself that he’s trying to leave behind. I think the device you used can maybe be looked at as something of a trope, especially within recent times in the FWA. It brought to mind the arc with Shawn Summers and his own internal demons, and some of the climactic sections reminded me of Cyrus Truth’s Carnal Contendership winning promos. That being said, I think the interactions between Jackson-Present and Jackson-Past were very strong, showed great character work (in both the progression and the development categories), and overcame the fact that the device itself has been used before. Some of these mono-/dialogues brought to mind the Gollum-Smeagol dynamic in Lord of the Rings. I’m not sure if that was a deliberate influence but as a Tolkien mark I loved it either way.

The Reagan Cole promo also featured some good character portrayal work away from the immediate context of the upcoming Steel Roulette match, with Cole saving a runt from some malicious older bullies. Thought this reinforced some of the key components of Cole’s character as we’ve seen him in the FWA. Parts of this promo felt fitting in a bookend (maybe a pause rather than an end) sort of way, with reflections on who Cole is as a person and how far he’s come in his career. I liked the links to Reagan’s (ancient) history with Death Walker/Darius Wright in a world championship match in another promotion, something which was also brought up in DW’s promo and gave Cole’s position in this match more gravitas and significance. It felt like the fragments of a very weighty promo, but I’d definitely liked to have seen you flesh out some of the points that you made (or began to make) in more detail. I think it’s fair to say that you had a lot more planned but understandable circumstances reduced the scope of what you could do, which is a shame, because you can see that there’s elements in this promo that would’ve been great had you the time to see out the vision properly. Think this is unfortunately more acutely noticeable in comparison to the Peacock roleplay, which also suffers in this regard to a certain extent.

With Death Walker, I felt there was an excellent balance struck between focus on your own character, his history and his present and his future, and reflections on your opponents in the match itself. I think this was only matched really by the Alyster Black promo in terms of balance between those two aspects of the grading rubric, with the other four promos choosing to tilt the Of course, something immediately noticeable in this promo is the similarity in setting between Katsu’s roleplay and Walker’s, with both of them set inside a prison, with both surrounded by stand-ins (more direct ones in the case of Katsu) for the other Steel Roulette competitors. Comparisons between the two promos, and particularly the settings thereof, therefore feel quite natural to make. Despite this initial similarity, it’s obvious that they are in very different facilities. Death Walker’s prison is, at times, that of the mind, something that comes through often whilst reading this roleplay. And, fittingly, the prison that he finds himself seems like one of a dystopian dictatorship, whilst the Katsu gym feels certainly less gritty (to elaborate on this: discussions on Cali’s internment resulting from her playing Pokemon, and a prison gym with a fair bit of cardio equipment like treadmills and exercise bikes, were a little jarring and made this environment feel less ‘real’, maybe deliberately so, than Walker’s). I also think that the ruminations on self in the two promos were approached very differently. For Katsu, this was achieved through dialogues with the rest of the Death Squad, which is something that we’ve seen before albeit in a different setting. With Death, the structure of the opening sections, the introduction of the Doctor, and the interactions with Whispers gave an overall more enigmatic, unique feel to how the story was told and the prison was presented.

The respective climactic sequences of these roleplays are also comparable, in that both Katsu and Death end up fighting, albeit with different motivations and consequences, with the other five in this match. I preferred Katsu’s approach here, with dialogue revealing a lot about the dynamics at play and, mostly, about her perceptions of the people she’s entering the chamber with. Although the action sequence at the end of Death’s promo was entertaining and fun to read, I’m ultimately more interested in his thoughts and what those actions mean. An argument can be made that this was adequately achieved in the Death Walker promo in the lead up to this fight section, and I guess it was, but I think this lengthy section was more conclusive but ultimately less satisfying than the open-ended culmination in the Katsu roleplay.

From a creativity perspective, I think the most immediately unique and impressive is the Chris Peacock promo (although re-visiting Peacock promos was done in my entirely undervalued Connection vs. FTN promo, and I chose better past ones to pastiche). I think this highly creative structure was successful in both allowing you to address each opponent in turn and provide match focus, as well as make some more meta analyses on Peacock and perceived repetitions. That being said, Alyster Black’s structure and general approach was perhaps equally as creative in a more subtle manner, and - as already touched upon - was more successful in using this structure to bring out the central themes (and key character points) of the promo. The set-up of the Death Walker and Katsu roleplays being similar didn’t affect them too much in this category for me, although maybe the Steel Roulette-prison metaphor in itself would be surface level if it were not for the way that this setting was built upon, particularly in the case of Death and the manner in which this was used to further character work. Fenix’s creativity came mostly in the way he achieved his character work. I think Reagan showed a lot of creativity in his prose and descriptive passages at the start of the promo, which were amongst some of the best I’ve seen for the Cole character.

The Katsu promo had the most moving parts and was the most striking in terms of its presentation, with multiple graphical elements used to really make the promo stand out. There were a few grammar errors (not so much grammar errors, more repeated punctuation marks and the like) throughout, though, which I feel would’ve taken less time to rectify than the graphics did to make and probably have the same effect on overall score. Of course, doing both would’ve meant this would’ve been a very difficult promo to beat from a presentation perspective, with the mugshot graphics in particular a really nice touch. Peacock, Black, and Fenix promos were all very clean generally, with Peacock’s roleplay definitely more ambitious with the overall look. Peacock and Black promos both felt presented as big-time, world title promos. Thought the Cole promo was quite clean overall, especially in the opening section, even if definitely simple (and, again, probably inhibited by circumstances) in how it was formatted. Death Walker promo also had issues in some of its presentation, but again - like in the case of Reagan - I think that’s down to a time/forum-related issue.

I really enjoyed reading these world title promos over the course of a day, and then the next day I did my other grading assignments. There was some real high-effort stuff on this card which didn’t go unnoticed in the grades - I think in terms of overall consistency across the card this was incredible output from top to bottom. I’ll try and get some quick (shorter) thoughts on the others I’ve read at some point before results.

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Originally posted by Welshy.

𝓢𝓪𝓷𝓽𝓪 𝓢𝓾𝓵𝓵𝔂 /Kleio De Santos

I absolutely loved this promo, lol. The channel surfing idea is unique as fuck, and was executed extremely well, and Kleio’s arc in this promo was so well done. The fact that her jealousy drove her to wanting her underlings in The Coven to lose at BiB, due to her own insecurities of feeling as though their success somehow makes her appear weak…fucking beautiful stuff. The “shows” themselves were also very well executed. You did a fantastic job of telling Kleio’s story, and displaying her mindset, motivations and emotions heading into this match, while also still offering some focus on her opponents during the Law and Order show in particular, and I really enjoyed Kleio’s verbal rundown of them during the prosecution. So…creativity (check), QOC (check), the presentation was great, with the gif of Kleio and the TVs at the start, and the show graphics and static etc, all really added to the visual presentation of the promo, though there were a couple spelling/grammar mistakes that I noticed. Not many, though. So Presentation (check). Character Portrayal is a pretty obvious (check), along with character development (check).

I’m not a judge, and I’ve never graded a promo, but in my head, you’ve ticked all the boxes for a 32+. It was wildly entertaining, creative, emotional, and most importantly…it had Trixie AND Ethel. Any promo that has those two in it should auto-win any match EVER!:lmao Fucking awesome stuff, dude.

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Originally posted by Tommy.

Some random feedback just off the top of my head. Yes, I'm late. Yes, this is normal. So, if anyone's still interested, here we go.

Let me preface this by saying that once again, this show served as a reminder of just how good the writing here is. People consistently pumping out promos at this level is absolutely awesome to see.

Sawyer Xavier
Blaine, first, let me say it's good to see you getting back into this. Your first promo back was one of my favorites from that cycle, and it felt like you did a really good job building on the foundation that you laid in this one. Feels like the Sawyer Xavier character is in a unique spot in the current landscape. He's been here longer than several people, not as long as some others, but this feels like a "clean slate" for him with your heightened level of involvement. In two promos, you've shown me exactly why I should care about the character, and that's the name of the game for me. Good work, bud, and I'm looking forward to seeing where you go with Sawyer next. You mentioned in the Discord that you were cutting this one close on time, but also knew that it didn't technically matter since you were likely facing a no-show. Was this as good as your recent return promo? Not in my opinion, but it was still good work, and did exactly what you needed it to do.

Kleio De Santos
Sully pulling off a really clever idea really shouldn't come as much of a surprise. Loved everything about this promo, but the presentation really set this one apart for me. The TV title setting with the different TV shows is one of those things that seems super obvious, but it's really not. This was creative from start to finish. I found it especially impressive how you still kept Kleio's portrayal intact while doing something so original. This was one of my favorite promos from the Anniversary Show. My only knock on this is that I wanted more of it, and that's no kind of a knock at all.

YDS
Beavie dropping a Pokemon promo is as "right" as anything can be. Beavie dropping a Pokemon promo is as right to me as a cup of hot coffee in the morning. Doing it in a trios match is just a clever play. As I mentioned in Sully's feedback, sometimes you trade in some CP/CD points to pursue a certain type of promo or a certain type of creativity. I didn't leave this promo feeling like I knew anything about YDS that I didn't know before, and that's fine. I didn't need to know anything new about them. I did learn at least one new Pokemon name (or maybe I was reminded of an old one). This was fun, and I enjoyed it.

Trixie
Welshy, I've told you privately how much I've enjoyed your progression, but it should be said publicly. You're not the writer you were when you made this sign-up, and it's been fun to watch. The story about the "big mean carnival men" beating up Trixie's friends was a clever way to reference the tag match from the week before involving DS/The Coven, and gave us a reason that Trixie cared about a seemingly random match with Crowe. The presentation was VERY nice and fed into the mood of the promo. My only knock on this promo is that it felt like you kinda chopped the end off a bit early. It was super smart to throw it into an "advertisement" for the Anniversary Show, but as a reader, I would've liked to have seen more "meat" (insert AEW crowd chant joke here) around the end of it.

Chris Crowe
This motherfucker legit gets on the Discord and says, "Yea, I'm gonna start on this thing after midnight" the night before the deadline and writes THAT?!?! Thanks, BT. Thanks for reminding me that when we team up, I'm Marty to your Shawn. I'm Typhoon to your Earthquake. I'm IRS to your Million Dollar Man. For real, I loved how you continued to lay the groundwork for "where has Chris Crowe been" while still answering "Where is Chris Crowe going" in this promo. A Chris Crowe shroom trip was not what I was expecting, and it was a joy to read.

Blake Taylor
When you bring a new character into a fed, especially one like this, it's easy to get overwhelmed and kinda "shrink." You didn't do that. The Blake Taylor promo did an excellent job of telling me who this guy is and why people in the FWA should care that he's here. As far as debut promos, that's really the most important part. Overall, this promo could have probably been helped by some more content, but striking the balance between "enough" and "too much" is hard, and ultimately, it only comes from learning what works and what doesn't. I'm excited to see where this character goes next, as a guy who is leaving a successful MMA career coming into a new realm should have a learning curve. I like what you're doing with Blake. Don't be afraid to mess with some presentation stuff.

Madison Gray
I don't think any of us really knew what to expect with this promo, and that's a good thing. While Madison had been booked on cards before, this was the first time we really got to dive into her character in my opinion. I know you had done the "Dear Diary" thing in the past, but this promo definitely thrived by adding in someone for Madison to play off of. I think this is in the same vein as Blake's promo in that there could have been "more" to it, but what you did obviously worked. I'm looking forward to seeing where the character goes, as I am with this wave of new/returning characters FWA has right now.

Chris Peacock
This was a massive undertaking, and you nailed it, as evidenced in the win. Doing callbacks to past promos, especially at this level was ballsy to say the least, Mando. I don't really have a "wish you had done this" thing with this promo, as there's not much of anything to change.

Katsu
One of my favorite things about reading these promos was how everyone chose to portray the fact that there were so many opponents. The prison-concept was a smart one, but I expected nothing less. You've shown plenty of creativity, and the whole "being locked in" in the context of the steel roulette was definitely a clever play. As far as "constructive feedback," I did feel like there were a couple moments where you may have focused a bit too heavily on your other characters, which I'm sure is easy to do when you're writing for 3 active characters. It just felt like there were a couple moments where Ririko and Cali (more Ririko for me) took the spotlight away from Katsu.

Reagan Cole
Was this as good as "Fuck Reagan Cole?" Of course, not. But that promo has been GOATed and I'll fight anyone who says otherwise. Nah, for real though, knowing that you're looking to take a break (OOC) actually made this promo hit a little different for me while reading it. Cole viewing this match as a last-ditch sort of scenario was actually a good idea. I loved the ending of Cole thinking "maybe I grab the opportunity this time instead of letting someone else do it." I also enjoyed Cole kinda encouraging himself by thinking back to the people he's beaten. Would have liked to have seen a bit more specific match focus for this particular promo, but I still love how you portrayed Cole in this one. Also, I've reviewed your request for time off, and it's been denied. Sorry, chief.

Death Walker
A couple shows ago, I mentioned that I felt like a promo you had posted lacked focus on the match. That was definitely not the case with this one. For me as a reader, this was probably my favorite promo that you've shared with us so far. Felt like you struck a solid balance between building on this other-worldly, demonic character and the match that you were staring down. Nice job on this promo.